New Years

It is cold and gray
Christmas Day was days ago
The New Year starts soon

December Weather

It's not just the cold
There are much worse things than that
Thick December fog

The River

You have the nuts now
There is one more card to come
River decides all

lunch

Hot spicy meat shaft
Nestled between soft white buns
MMmmmmm, sausage sandwich

Wheelie Laptop Bags

Wheelie Laptop Bags
Many businessmen have them
Big Bunch of Pussies

My Favorite Season

The leaves are falling
Cool crisp air and shorter days
It's football season

Poker

Stud, Anaconda
Razz baseball Texas hold 'em
Omaha hi lo

Definition

I want to do it
But something's preventing me
Impotence defined

It's Good To Know The Cook

Good banana bread
Yum! Another Tasty Bite
Oh look, a long hair.

Working

I'm glad it's OK
That I ate my lunch today
I'm an employee

Dinner

Thick shaft of hot meat
I wrap my lips around it
MMmmmmm, Polish Sausage

Wafflers

Have To Leave At Four
Some People Are Flexible
I Say What I Mean

NULL

It has no value
It ruins brain cells, wastes time
I really hate NULL

Weird

Red Beaver Stir Fry
Lime Green Spicy Dipping Sauce
Annoying Haiku

What's on TV?

Hot lonely housewife
self discovery journey
lifetime movies suck

Tech support

Dad called yesterday
We have not talked in a while
fucking computers

Sledding

Henry is sledding
From the top all the way down
One big laundry pile

Facebook Haiku

Get Facebook Friend Names
Arrange Them Into Haiku
Hit The Share Button

butt

Hot glistening meat
I want a piece of that butt
I love barbecue

Job

Who knows what they want
I don't think it's my coworkers
Work sucks hairy balls

Tasty

You know you want it
Tangy flavor on your tongue
Eat buffalo wings

Breeze

Feel the warm soft breeze
Gently wafting through the air
Oh dear, I farted

Billboard

See the pretty face
White mess on succulent lips
The sign says got milk

Introduction

I like haiku. A lot. Most other poetry puts me to sleep. I guess it is the simple rules and the lack of pretentiousness. Follow the technical rules and BAM! you have a haiku.

So, without further ado, here are some haikus that are, as far as I know, original.

Enjoy