Technology

High expectations
Devices should do their jobs
Technology sucks

Spring

I hear birds chirping
The garden awaits planting
Time for spring cleaning

Wife Swap

One wife is enough
If you need to trade, you're screwed
This is so stupid

Popsicles

It fills up my mouth
Drips down the back of my throat
I love popsicles

Possible Steubenville Sentences

A public hanging?
Castration by belt sander?
Steel wool sodomy?

Touchpads on laptops

I start typing code
The cursor jumps randomly
I hate you, touchpad

Goals

Having goals is hard
If the goals are worth reaching
You will fail sometimes

Parenting

Ballet, Cub Scouts, Art
Soccer Practice, School Concert
I have grown weary

Decisions

Eat wings at Hooters?
I believe I would rather
Watch hooters at Wings!

A Song of Ice and Fire: A Summary

The stag has fallen
The lion ravages all
Winter is coming

Cartoon Dialogue

Heard this from Felix
Do you want hot rubber balls?
That sounds so painful

Quick Asian Buffalo Wing Sauce

Soy sauce, sriracha
Equal parts, whisk in a bowl
Salty hot cock sauce

At The Barber Shop

At the barber shop
Getting a haircut today
Why do babies cry?

Sacred Or Taboo?

Holy Eucharist
Eat His flesh and drink His blood
Cannibalism

The Fools Come Out At Night

He's driving at night

And no one knows where he is

Turn on your headlights

Things That Are A Little Wrong

Ketchup on hot dogs

Football players with pink cleats

Men's moisturizer

Many Meetings

Another work day
Go from meeting to meeting
No work will get done

California Style Cuisine

You take some good food
Add weird shit like goat testes
California style